Is Troye Sivan pop music's firstly openly gay star? Hardly. But in 2018, he's the most boundary-pushing and visible (plus, the first who's spoken so starkly about *ahem* blooming), and he's admitting that's sometimes a difficult role to play.

In a new interview with Billboard, Sivan says he recognizes his role in the industry offers him a unique platform — still, it's not always one he wants to use.

“I do feel a little bit like a guinea pig sometimes,” he said. “That the world or the press or whatever is sort of using me and a bunch of other young people right now as education points, [like] we’re teaching the world about all of these different things.”

Sometimes, though, his music is less about teaching and more about enjoying the quiet of a dull night. Case in point: a new single with Ariana Grande "Dance to This," which Sivan insisted is less devious than it may seem.

It’s "about how, after a while, all of these parties and nights out kind of start to blur, and you get to the point where staying at home and making food and making out in the kitchen sounds like the ideal night," he noted.

That being said, though, Sivan's forthcoming LP will explore more adult themes, too — namely, his previous affair with a much-older man. Sivan said he began the relationship with his online-boyfriend when he was only 17.

“I’m worried because I don’t want to ever come across that I’m condoning that or anything like it," he said. "But I felt, greater than all of those worries, a responsibility to tell that true story — of the curious gay kid who puts himself in some kind of shady situation to find a connection, like all of us crave.”

Troye Sivan Through the Years

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